An artisanally crafted blog curated by Cooking Lager for discerning readers of beer bloggery

Thursday, 1 April 2010

The saviour of cask ale

In a shameless attempt to get on Zak Avery’s roll call on honour for reasons I myself cannot understand. Why would I want to? Does it matter? I think maybe I just love the giant wine glass, that’s why it’s important. Anyway as its cask ale week I had I pint of cask ale. Bitter in fact. A pint of bitter. Like a right old man. For reference the pint in question was called Hydes Jekyll’s Gold. Though it wasn’t gold it was brown. Light brown. Why isn’t it called Jekyll’s light brown?

I was going to take a photo of it or even a short video but my mobile ran out of juice, so you’ll just have to take my word for it and not that I just ripped Dredgies picture off his blog. Which is probably a different beer altogether. But at least it’s brown bitter. I could mention the price, but my boss bought it me after work, so I didn’t pay for it.

It was quite nice. Nothing wrong with it. A pleasant enough glass of easy going pisswater I’d have again. It could be improved. They could make it golden with a lighter more sugar efficient malt. They could chill it. They could use a different hop like for instance Saaz. They could use a different yeast strain to ferment it at a lower temperature. They could rename it lager. They could put it in a can and sell it for tuppance. But that would be to judge it for what it wasn’t rather than what it was, and as far as it went it was perfectly fine. The pub wasn’t that bad either. Not half the dump I was expecting. No shaven headed tattooed thugs with missing ears. Quite respectable people. Quiet unlike a pub. Is it a pub though? When is a dump not a pub? Tandy seems to think it's related to food. Maybe it's the absence of dumpery?

Not sure why a cask ale week is required. In a free country of freedom of choice people are free to make the choice they like. I don’t mind people promoting stuff, its part of a free society. So whilst I don’t see the point I’ve nothing against it. It is when people cease to convince and attempt to coerce it becomes unpalatable. It’s okay promoting pongy old man’s beer. Spreading lies about binge drinking, pre loading, and the dangers of cheap lager in order to have what you don’t like kyboshed amounts to coercion. So as far as the activities of the ale jihadist’s go, cask ale week must rank as one of their more harmless endeavours.

I much enjoyed the discussion attached to Tandy’s blog in regard to the growth and decline of different beers and reached the following conclusion. This pint of bitter was my second pint of cask ale this year. That’s a 100% growth in cask ale consumption. No other drinker in the blogosphere can lay claim to a 100% increase in cask ale consumption during cask ale week. I deserve some sort of prize for that surely? An award for being cask ale’s saviour is the very least I deserve. Has anyone else managed a 100% increase in cask ale drinking? Not Tandy, that’s for sure.

I could drink more but that would lower my increase. Another pint would only be a 50% increase on the year. A fourth pint a 25% increase. I’m seeing the law of diminishing returns here. Every pint reduces my contribution to cask ale week. Better stop whilst I’m ahead. Still, I’ve done my bit. On the roll call of honour please Zak.


Tandleman said...

You gotta quit while you're winning that's for sure.

And are you sure it was Jekyll's Gold you had. It is always pretty damn blonde in my experience. Mind you Hawkshead Lakeland Gold is decidedly brown even on their website, so you never know.

Séan Billings said...

"Anyway as its cask ale week I had I pint of cask ale."

Come on Cookie. You can't make an April fools that obvious and expect us to fall for it.

ZakAvery said...

Sorry Cookie, but in a fit of pique I decided I wasn't going to be guardian of the roll of honour any longer. I couldn't handle the responsibility.

Maybe you could start one in your new role as real ale jihadist? Whatever next - blogging for a prominent West Country brewery?

Cooking Lager said...

@Tandy, anything slightly darker than lout is brown, buddy.

@Sean, honest to goodness, whey would I lie? Especially as Zak has sacked off his roll call of honour. Honour is the word. I couldn't expect to get on it with lies. There is no honour in that.

@Zak You are the man to hold the roll call, Zak. No one else has the moral authority.

Ed said...

Surely Saaz hops are a bit posh for cheap canned lager, wouldn't tetrahydro-iso-α-acids be more up your street?

BeerReviewsAndy said...

excellent fella! this really made me smile!

Rob said...

Yeah true Ed. Sazz hops rule and plenty of top fermented ales use them. Lagering and bottom fermenting can also be a nice touch.